Growing up, I knew I didn’t want to have children. My goal was to marry someone with kids and live that happy life. I detoured from that road just a smidge. I mean, I did get married, later divorced, and ended up with two kids…. Well Kids of the furry kind.

(Joshua Williams)

Meet my sweet boys Parker and Bruce Wayne! These two sweet boys are my shadow, nurse pugs when I’m sick, my taste testers in the kitchen, and my hoovers when I drop food. Parker is almost 9 and Bruce Wayne is 6. No they aren’t brothers; Parker came from a reputable breeder in Kentucky, while Bruce Wayne recuse from Vanderburgh Humane Society. As you can tell, I’m one of those pet parents that take their kids to see Santa Paws, the Easter bunny, and dare I say buy Halloween costumes and sweaters for their pictures. And Of course we do celebrate birthdays!! It was Parker’s 8th birthday. He knew he was getting something fabulous, or he wouldn’t have humored me with wearing the hat long enough for pictures.

Before you get to thinking they are the sweetest little angels anywhere, they have a vicious dark side. Well, not vicious, their curious. Everything belongs to them. If it can fit in their mouth, it will be swallowed. They are the circus in my apartment that never leaves town.

Bruce Wayne….. Here you see him longing for that chapstick. He’s gotten a hold of 6 of them. I guess he likes to have kissable lips. He’ll climb on my furniture, and get a hold of anything. One morning he managed to knock a tube of icing off my counter, and ate half of the tube when I was in the shower. I was greeted with a hyper hypo pug whose tail looked like it was going to fly off from being wagged so much. The next morning, he jumped on the counter, knocked off random bills and found the other two tubes of icing. I came out of the shower, walked in the living room, and saw mass destruction. Green icing all over the blue love seat, Bruce Wayne looked pleased with himself. Another time I had managed to get a picture of him tap dancing on my coffee table, only as proof, his tap dancing skills are horrible! Just like big foot and loch ness monster pictures, it’s blurry. It makes it more credible that way!!

Now, don’t think Parker doesn’t get in his fair share of trouble. As a puppy Parker showed great interest in to paper products. Toilet paper, paper towels, birthday cards, electric bills, you name it- It’s delicious!!! For a while Parker was addicted to dryer sheets. Yes, he loved the taste of Snuggle fabric sheets. He kicked the habit when I switched to liquid fabric softener, it was for the best.  Since Parker is older, he’s less of an instigator, but he’ll help if Bruce Wayne is in something. I found both of them in something, and of course Parker leaves the scene of the crime quick! Bruce becomes the sitting duck. Many times, I will find Parker with something hanging out of his mouth. He likes to act like there is nothing going on, but when I ask questions, he gives me the looks of “Whatchu talking about momma?” I reach for what is sticking out, and then he runs away.

With all of their shenanigans, I wouldn’t trade a day of it! It’s made me conscious of where I put stuff. Every day I learn where their “sweet spots” are, EVERYWHERE! I make mental notes to myself to not put something on the counter in reach of their sweet faces.  I love that I have love from them when I come home, and when I have food the love me a LOT!!! When I’m sick, they are more than happy to nap and lounge around with me. They hover when I’m sad, and they both think sticking their butts in my face will cure tears. I haven’t figured that one out yet!