Christmas Tree Ornaments – Husband Versus Wife
December 8, 2011 2:47 PM The Christmas tree is up and lit in the Cornish living room. Barely a branch is left in my opinion. I say every year, “Is it time to get rid of some ornaments?” My wife usually meets me with a look as if I’d suggested we kick our 10 month old out of the house.
That’s right, the woman that accuses me of being a hoarder, has never gotten rid of ANY christmas ornament that she’s been given or made, no matter how meager the materials. Take this ornament for example.
This is a basket of some sort. She swears it used to house the Baby Jesus. Funny that she has no problem keeping the torn and tattered paper basket, but can’t locate our infant Lord and Savior. I have tried and failed to banish this one from the tree.
Next take a look at this little fella.
I afftionately call this guy, Saran Wrap Angel. Over the years, its come to look more like a wadded up piece of trash than a messenger from God, but who could discard something with a such a happy face, so imperfectly drawn on a wooden ball head with pipe cleaner halo? Certainly not my wife.
Oh, but friends here’s my favorite.
This makes its way back to our tree every year. What is it? Well, it looks like a plain ol candy cane. That’s exactly what it is. This, as far as I know, has no sentimental meaning, no special back story. It is just a wrapped candy cane that has migrated from the tree in my wife’s parents’ house to our house. Why?!? It’s just a candy cane! I am not allowed to leave this in the ornament box, or throw it away, or even eat it (not that I’d want to considering it probably came from around 1986). This is why my wife HAS to be stopped, or we will have to buy a 3rd Christmas tree (yes our second has ONLY penguin ornaments on it…don’t get me started).
Things would be a lot more fun and festive if she only followed my lead on Christmas ornaments…
Here’s my Jamican Santa, barefoot of course. And you don’t want to know what’s in his bag.
If you’ve ever wanted a Hippopatamus for Christmas, I have you covered. OK, this isn’t ever really an ornament, but I hide it in the tree every year. It’s a tradition, kind of like the pickle thing some people do. What do you win when you find Mr. Hippo? Don’t you wish you knew?
And finally, the number one reason my ornaments are better than my wife’s: St. Anthony, the patron Saint of Bacon. Need I say more?
So what kind of tree do you have? A mess of stuff like this? A themed tree like my wife’s penguin tree? A color coordinated tree? Comment below and let us know and Merry Christmas!
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