Ten Most Bizarre Nativity Scenes You Can Buy Online

It’s always nice to see a Nativity Scene as part of a Christmas decoration.  So often today, the lights and snowmen have taken the spotlight away from the true meaning of Christmas.  Lately, some folks have taken some liberties with the traditional Nativity, and whether or not you think it’s right to do so, here’s the ten most bizarre examples I could find online.

1. Good King Wiener Dog

This was the one that inspired this list.  My best friends actually own and display this very set in their kitchen.  And if you’re not a fan of the daschund, Etsy has plenty of other breeds to choose from for all your Nativity needs.  Sidebar: What gifts do you bring a  wiener dog Lord?  Gold, Myrrh, and Frankfurters!

2. Holy Frijoles

What’s more fun than dressing up tiny beans in a manger scene?  Giving them a super quirky name like this.  Spend some time with these musical fruits and it’ll be anything but a silent night.

3. The Holy Scavengers

Artist, Phillis Hartley leaves food on her back porch a lot.  That’s just an assumption from the beautiful yet strange interpretation she’s done of the birth of Christ, featuring a family of raccoons, and other random animals that might wander onto your lawn at night.  While the original wise men followed a star in the East, these critters smelled some half-eaten burritos in your trash.

4. The First No-Egg

This is a Nativity all wrapped up in a neat little package, but there’s just so many logistical problems with this one, like how can Mary lay a baby in a manger when she doesn’t have hands?  Also, why is the cow the same size as the little egg-shaped savior?  The angel can’t be heard “on high” because she’s right behind you in the back row.  The word is they had to spend the night in the egg carton because there was no room in the crisper drawer?

5.BREAKING: Giant Attacks Bethlehem

I understand what the artist was going for here, but it still creeps me out.  It is supposed to be a wood carver making a Nativity Scene, but it really looks like a giant has stumbled upon the stable and is about to devour the manger and carry away the little king to his castle above the beanstalk.  At least Joseph appears to be reasoning with him, and hoping to trade some Myrrh to spare their lives.

6. Beary Christmas

I’m sure this one came from the Smoky Mountains.  Those people will make black bears on everything.  Just what you want to hear when you travel: You’re in a place known to be crawling with wild carnivorous monsters…and we’re proud of it.  Anyway, this representation of the Nativity has a bit of cuteness, but still disturbing, because you know they got those clothes from some unsuspecting campers.  I’ve seen Yogi cartoons before.

7. Now Wait A Minute

Let me start by saying, often times, white Americans take liberties with history.  I’m sure the image of Jesus has been “Americanized” throughout the years.  I won’t even get into all  the wrong we’ve done to the Native Americans, but however you look at it, I’m pretty darn sure this did NOT happen like this.

8. O Come All Ye Squeekers

This is for the folks that always wished they could make a donkey look like a duck, or for those who have the urge to put on the best Christmas pageant ever, while soaking in a hot bath.  On a positive note, just think how much time the shepherds saved once the Heavenly Host called them to the manger…they could just fly along with them.

9.Sweet Holiday Treats

I’ve heard of Christmas cookies, but Christmas cupcakes?  Not sure I feel comfortable biting into the Holy Family.  The other thing that concerns me is the googly eyes and the appearance that sorta of resembles South Park characters.

10. Do You Smell What I Smell

Why not make a manger scene out of pork products?  Because it’s weird, that’s why.  I’m as big a fan of bacon as anyone, but when my Lord and savior is replaced by a Lil Smoky, I have to pass.  At least we skipped the middle man with the pigs in the stable.  And of course, when finding a good compliment for sausage, sauerkraut is a great choice for hay!